Monday, July 13, 2009

Evil, Orgies, and Growing Up

Finally, Entourage returned for the summer last night. HBO is obviously gunning for a big Sunday night with True Blood, Hung, and Entourage. Hung, I'm still undecided about, as it's got this annoying habit of starting at the end and flashing back to reveal each episode. I don't mind non-linear storytelling, as long it's done well. (Pulp Fiction) But it can also be a shortcut to try and keep the click-happy viewing public engaged by putting the climax upfront and then making us sit through the build-up. The problem with this trick, when it's done repeatedly, is that it's needed only if the episodes are consistently THAT boring in the build-up. Also, the "hook" or climax had better be good enough to keep me watching to see what caused it, and I'm not sure Hung is doing that. But it's happily (and luckily) sandwiched between Blood and the boys, and not only is Thomas Jane still cute, but Jane Adams is interesting, so I may as well give it a shot. I just hope it doesn't become a chore, the way that Weeds and Nurse Jackie feel.

Those two shows are definitely living off audience goodwill. Weeds at least culled its own goodwill with a few very funny seasons, but Jackie is leaching off the goodwill of Edie Falco and The Sopranos -- and neither show is delivering.

Entourage, of course, has built up gallons of good will over the seasons, and it has cemented itself as a thing of summer. The first episode wasn't bad, but it did coast a bit. There were a few funny bits, and they've thrown down the gauntlet for the season, as the whole first episode was hinting at the end of this protracted adolescence for the guys. Drama was hard at work, Turtle was in a good relationship, E was managing his now successful company and thinking of moving out on his own, and even Vinny took a huge step toward independence by finally getting his driver's license. As if that's not enough, Lloyd is finally making his stand and demanding Ari consider promoting him. I remember high school graduation, and how bittersweet it all was, because while everything was good and it was exciting to commence onto bigger and better things, it was also sad because I knew nothing would ever be like high school again. Friends would drift apart and move away, and we'd start doing things instead of fucking around at the beach for days on end. Seeing Vince come home to his empty house was a bit sad, like going home after the prom. He's back on top in the town, but here he was, all alone. Luckily, they didn't play this heavy-handed, as it IS Entourage and it wisely knows its place as a COMEDY. And I assume we can sidestep the sad thing of friends drifting off, considering this season's tagline is simply "life changes. friends don't."

Even luckier, True Blood also knows its place, particularly in the most recent episode written by Alan Ball himself. It's not a drama, it's not a horror show, it's not a comedy. It's all those things. Admittedly, the horror barometer dropped this episode. In fact, I don't think I had to turn away from the screen due to squick factor even once. But the comedy was high and Ball got the ball really rolling.

Prepare yourself, because the following sentence is one that I never thought I'd type, and you probably didn't either. I'm really a little sick of the orgy scenes. Gah! Can you believe it? A little part of me actually died at having to type that! But that's how good Blood is overall. Unlike Hung, which has been using the jumbled timeline to build more interest, Blood has been exquisitely good at keeping each episode ended on a cliffhanger, picking up the next one at exactly that spot, and then keeping the tension/action superbly taut. But for three episodes in a row, we've gotten prolonged orgy scenes, and they were really starting to weigh things down because it just wasn't new. FINALLY this episode we got not only the orgy, but an epic sex scene between Tara and Eggs as that crazy vibrating bitch finally revealed something new, too. And, instead of just sex and dancing in a Matrix 2 rave-like manner, this time the orgy goers started doing face plants in plates of sandwiches and eating dirt. I can give that a thumbs up.

Something else I give a thumbs up? Whoever does the makeup and lighting on this show is top notch. I mean, I know we're dealing with pretty girls to start with. And they've always used the lighting in an almost film noir way in this show. But all I know is this -- if any female is asked to appear on this show, she should say yes immediately, because they are going to make her look supernaturally beautiful.


I've had enough of the crappy curls on Sookie so far this year. It's made her look a little over-made-up, but I did love the hell out of her fancy yellow traveling outfit this week. So Sookie.

But it was the boys who stole the show. From LaFayette's regenerated libido-laced dance to Jason Stackhouse laying down the ultimate in idiot logic at church camp. When his nemesis tries to end the hilarious discussion about who the first biblical vampire was by simply saying, "All I know is that you can count on God to make sure evil gets punished," Jason was able to shut him up with this gem: "Oh yeah? Then how do you explain Europe?" So beautifully Jason Stackhouse.

And, finally, I have to succumb to Vampire Bill. From threatening sweet Hoyt with "Are you going to leave or do I have to throw you out? Of a window! That is closed!" To slyly telling Sookie, "I am a vampire. I am supposed to be tormented." I have finally come around to Stephen Moyer's deadpan deliveries and lack of contractions. He, more than anyone else, cracks me up. He had me last year with his damn Frescas for guests, but this year I'm getting quite a charge out of him. Maybe it's because he's the resident "Johnny Drama" of the show, constantly beleaguered, always played the bitch by Eric and Jessica and whoever else. But he has this strange delivery that I guess maybe only the Brits can master, cause he really does remind me a bit of Cary Grant when he says offhanded shit like, "I will need your credit card number" and it cracks me up. Well, you know, if Cary Grant was painted in white chalk, wearing fangs, and was a Louisiana southern gentleman-come-deadly predator. And I love when people call him "Vampire Bill" instead of just Bill. And this episode, Ball wrote him the best lines to bring out his wry humor while still sticking it to him at every opportunity. Him trying to navigate the tutelage of his young progeny Jessica is just comic gold, as is watching her struggle to not only grow up, but grow into her new life, er, or, undeath.

I am just so glad the holiday is over and we get our Sunday nights now. Of course, I'll probably pitch a fit once Labor Day rolls around. Not just because it is a bittersweet time -- both fun with the big picnics and parties and fireworks (though probably no orgies at casa DiPlacido -- probably), but also sad because it is calling an end to the fun of summer, but mostly because it will once again interrupt my addiction, and I'm just not grown up enough to handle it.

Posted by SusanD :: 7:37 PM :: 2 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------oOo---------------

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Summer Reading

The new issue of Eclectica is live, and it features a great interview with Ellen Meister and Saralee Rosenberg about the creative/writing process. It also features a great new story by William Reese Hamilton.

I am also interviewed by the talented Ashley Lister in the newest issue of ERWA. I truly feel for people who have to interview me, as I am a terrible combination of utterly boring, and unreasonably aloof. But Ashley asked great questions which made it easy to oblige.

Also over at ERWA, you'll find Donna George Storey's latest column, which is perfect for summer, as it features picnics and porn. Enjoy "Naked Lunch" with Donna.

Last but most certainly not least, I've been reading the new book by Ron Currie, Jr., Everything Matters! I only started it two days ago, but I'll be finishing it up tonight, which is a little sad. (I get sad when something I'm loving comes to an end.) As for finishing it so quickly, well, I think we all know how I can get a bit obsessed when I'm given some good material. This book is no exception. It's not genre that I usually slip into for summer, but it grabbed me from the start with the strong premise. While still in utero, Junior Thibodeau starts getting introductory messages from a strange voice. Though the voice is rather cheery and informative, it also drops the major buzzkill on him that the earth will be destroyed by a comet when Junior is 36. It then takes an unusual -- and very ambitious -- direction by placing chapters in the various family members' perspectives. Junior's mother, father, and brother advance the time and story, along with splices of The Voice. So far, it's quirky and endearing while being shaded with darkness. Too dark and not nearly whimsical or quirky enough to be like a Tom Robbins tale, though the message part is reminiscent of some of his stuff. Overall it's much more in style and tone to Vonnegut, and there's just nothing wrong with that. So if you're looking for summer reading with a little bit more protein than the usual junk food fare, consider checking it out. I think you'll find yourself engrossed and glad you picked it up.

Posted by SusanD :: 7:48 PM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------oOo---------------

Monday, June 29, 2009

Addicted to Blood

I'm a little miffed at HBO. When you create shows that are the viewing equivalent of crack cocaine, it is my opinion that you must then deal responsibly with this commodity. I understand that next weekend is the prime party/holiday of summer, but the fireworks are going to have slightly less sparkle this year because I'll know it's because of the festivities that my dealer has blocked my access to my addiction. Which is to say, only three incredibly engrossing episodes into the season, HBO is going to make us sanguephiles wait for two weeks for another new episode. Fuckers. Fuckers!

Last night, they debuted the new comedy they're going to pair with Entourage, Hung. And, yes, it's about exactly what it sounds like. The titular character is played by Thomas Jane, who's always been about an 11 out of 10 on the cuteness meter, and I think he'll be able to hold this series down and keep me interested.


That expectation comes with a big caveat, though. From the overly-long pilot, I already got the feeling that this new "comedy" was going to jump into the new "dramedy" genre, much like the once-great Weeds. But the proliferation of this genre has lately started to strike me much like a lot of "literary fiction" that I read. After a short while, it starts to ramble along without much forward thrust, or the ability to keep each episode contained, and it ends up becoming a bit of a mess -- a drama that's not very dramatic, or comedy that just isn't all that funny. I'm sick of shit like that. I'm so sick to death of Weeds and Nancy fucking Botwin, and already the potential of Nurse Jackie seems to be flaming out after just a few episodes, mostly because they're walking that line and without the comedy, it just doesn't work for me. (In neither case, by the way, do I blame the lead actresses -- Edie Falco and Mary Louise Parker -- because they both have shown fine comic chops, but the writers just seem to not be up to the task of bringing the goods.

So, I hope that Hung mines its man-whore premise for all it's worth and that it can, uh, measure up to the comic bent of Entourage. Easily one of the best shows on TV for the first couple seasons, Entourage gets both praised and dissed -- and justly so on both counts -- because they've got both Piven and the startling funny and awesome Kevin Dillon keeping it rolling.


But it does, admittedly, suffer from a rather high douchey quotient at times. Last season, Entourage was ahead of the curve with the economic downturn as Vince struggled to stay saleable in Hollywood, failed, went broke, and then went home. And, for the second time, he revealed himself to be a real asshole when things don't roll his way, and E paid the price and absorbed his wrath. It pissed me off, because it finally made me root for E. But, all in all, maybe it was a good thing. E finally has me on his side, and I can forgive Vinny, and from all previews, it appears as though the boys are once again riding high in Hollywood when they return in just two weeks. Now, if only this would be an indicator of a global turnaround, things would be perfect.

But it is, even more than the return of the boys of summer, the return of True Blood after the holiday that I'll be most interested in. Salivating for, actually. Much like how E finally made the transformation last season, True Blood's writers did a quick arc with one of their newer characters to make her riveting. The young Deborah Ann Woll made her first appearance as Jessica near the end of last season when Bill was forced to "make" her. She was nearly heartbreaking in her terror, and then unexpectedly hilarious once she realized her new power. But that quickly devolved into annoying brattiness that was just too much to take, for both super-Vampire Eric, and for me, as the audience. But they've very quickly given her a powerful arc and Deborah's pulled it off beautifully, culminating last night in one of the sweetest and awkwardly sexy scenes Blood has given us yet. Another part of the thanks for those scenes and this new story playing so well goes to the affable likability factor of Jim Parrack's Hoyt Fortenberry, which is off the charts.

By the very nature of the show, where seemingly main characters get murdered, dismembered, or simply exsanguinated regularly, they're going to have to fall into the bad routine of bringing in "red shirts," or, like any team going for a championship, they're going to have depend quite a bit on their bench. And, luckily for them, they casted strongly and must've had a multiple season arc in mind, because Hoyt is a great example of a seemingly background guy coming off the bench and scoring right away. All last year, he was a sweet-natured pal of Jason's who simply lamented his loneliness. He had a few cute throwaway scenes that all fell into place when young Jessica strolled into Merlotte's with a striking combination of innocence and predatory beauty. Hoyt was, naturally, enchanted. Watching these two awkwardly flirt was both charming and charged -- the perfect mix of dreamy and danger that this show thrives on. Not to mention that Hoyt, along with Eric, does tons to raise the "good looking" quotient on the show.


And Eric continues to delight with his terrible beauty, and his loyal Pam is just simply a scream every week. But another "bench" player, Ginger at Fangtasia, has been the quintessential scream queen for a couple weeks running now. She shoots Lafayette, and SHE erupts into hysterical screeches.


This week it was Sookie who got her to unleash her shriek, but it was just as funny. I can't wait to see what makes her scream next. That's the shit that just makes this show rock.

I do have to say that I'm not fully engaged with Jason or Tara so far this season. I've had about enough of Tara being happy and nice with Eggs. He, too, has been thrown into the "shirtless" brigade, and with good reason, because old Eggs has a bod so hot you could fry bacon it. But he needs to do something about now other than just walk around shirtless. Given that he's living with crazy-ass Bachanalian Maryann, I suspect he'll be doing something soon. And poor clueless Jason falling into that cult -- I swear I can see where this is leading, and I don't like that much, because all this show ever does is surprise me, so hopefully I'm wrong.

Much like these half-hour shows that have an identity crisis regarding their genre, I still don't know how to pigeonhole True Blood. It's horror -- and often gorily so; it's comedy and it's a bit of melodrama; sometimes it's romance, and a whole bunch of sexy, too. Much like the beverage it's named after, it's a weird, synthetic mix that's probably not everyone's taste, but for those who do crave it, it's nearly essential. And now it's two weeks until we get more of it. There. Right there. That's something to make Ginger scream bloody murder.

Posted by SusanD :: 8:19 PM :: 2 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------oOo---------------

Friday, June 26, 2009

Waxing Eloquent

If you're too faint of heart to follow True Blood, then this new essay by Donna George Storey may not be for you. She tells us all about her first experience getting a Brazilian wax. She says it was for research. I say that's definitely suffering for your art!

Posted by SusanD :: 8:28 PM :: 2 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------oOo---------------

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

X in Audio!

This is pretty cool news. I was lucky enough to have a short story included in Susie Bright's awesome, lovingly and sensually created erotica collection, X: The Erotic Treasury. It's a really gorgeous, cloth covered book with a slipcover and all, and it's stuffed full of excellent stories. Because of its glam looks, it makes a great gift or bedside keepsake.


BUT! I just found out that if you want to check out the stories in a little more economical manner, it's also now in in Kindle edition for $15.39.

BUT! Even cooler, it's just been made into an audiobook! I've never heard anyone read my work, so this is just terribly exciting. I'm downloading it right now. (also, it's actual PROOF to me that someone other than a friend HAS read one of my stories now!) I'm going to listen to mine before the replay of True Blood tonight! (And crikey, could SOMEONE who watches True Blood PLEASE freaking visit this blog to appreciate the work I put into that damn game and giggle at some of the jokes! Work with me here, fangbangers!)

Oh, back to X, though. The audio-book is now available! Right here! X audiobook!

Posted by SusanD :: 7:49 PM :: 4 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------oOo---------------

Sunday, June 21, 2009

True Blood Drinking Game

Now, as you may know, when I find a show that really trips my triggers, I don't just watch it. I enjoy watching it. Volume up, phone off, and plenty of cocktails flowing. And if you have a few pals around who also enjoy the show, and cocktails, it can eventually lead the formation of a drinking game. Now, of course, you can take a crack at this with your choice of beverage, either beer of your choice, a vodka martini (three parts vodka and no parts vermouth) or Tru Blood (two parts B positive with one part O negative sounds about right). But whatever your choice of beverage, I'd suggest that unless you're wired like Maryann seems to be, you may want to pick one character and just drink according to his/her prompts instead of trying to tackle every rule, all the time. (The way I do.) Also, if any other fangbangers out there have any ideas to add to this list, let me know and I'll update it so we can all get snockered on Sundays (and repeat Tuesdays) together.

JASON STACKHOUSE
Jason is shirtless -- drink
Jason is obviously gratuitously shirtless -- drink two
Jason is screwing someone -- drink
Jason thinks he killed someone -- drink
Jason gets insulted by Andy -- drink
Jason lacks a comeback for Andy -- drink
Jason manages a comeback to Andy -- Celebrate! Keep on drinking!
Jason does something outrageously stupid and macho -- drink
Jason gets manipulated by someone -- drink

TARA
Tara cussed someone out -- drink
Tara bitches about her mom -- drink
Tara bitches at her mom -- drink twice
Tara is nice to her mom -- Keep on drinking and cuss Tara out.

BILL
Bill does something dorky -- drink
Bill does something old-fashioned -- drink and offer any guests a Fresca.
Bill says "Sook-ay" and sounds like Elvis as he does -- drink twice
Bill glamours someone -- drink
Bill shows skin -- drink
Bill shows fang -- drink twice and remember to recycle the bottle.
Bill sinks fang into Sookie -- keep on drinking

SAM MERLOTTE
Sam pines for Sookie -- drink
Sam pines for Tara -- drink
Sam gets Tara -- drink twice
Sam gets Sookie -- keep on drinking!
Sam gets yelled at by Sookie -- sulk and drink
Sam gets yelled at by Tara -- drink
Sam gets yelled at by any female -- drink
Sam changes to the dog -- drink
Dog changes back to Sam and we get a skin shot of Sam -- drink twice and say "He's no Jason, but he's alright."

LAFAYETTE
Lafayette wears lipstick/nail polish or some sort of makeup -- drink
Lafayette flirts with a girl -- drink
Lafayette flirts with a guy -- drink twice
Lafayette flirts with a VAMPIRE -- drink
Lafayette trusts Jason -- drink
Lafayette gets screwed by Jason -- drink twice
Lafayette shows skin -- drink
Lafayette puts someone in their place -- drink and call your friend a hooker.

SOOKIE
Sookie yells at Sam -- drink
Sookie yells at Bill -- drink
Sookie gives some love to Sam -- drink twice
Sookie gives it up to Bill -- drink twice
Sookie gives Bill neck -- keep on drinking and take your B12 vitamin
Sookie avoids being glamoured -- drink
Sookie hears someone's thoughts -- drink and resist the urge to adjust your surrond sound
Sookie wears short-shorts -- drink
Sookie shows ample flesh -- keep on drinking and say "I guess it's been a long time since "The Piano" but it's still a little weird."

GROUP DRINKS
TERRY BELLEFLEUR does something endearingly kooky -- drink
ANDY BELLEFLEUR gets pissed at not being taken seriously -- drink
JESSICA compares BILL unfavorably to ERIC -- drink and say "Amen."
Anyone compares BILL unfavorably to ERIC -- drink twice
ERIC does something to trump BILL -- drink
ANY VAMPIRE does something to trump BILL -- drink
BILL gets the upper hand with ANY VAMPIRE -- drink twice
PAM wears dominatrix garb -- drink
PAM wears a sweater-outfit -- drink twice
Any VAMPIRE gets staked -- drink
Any VAMPIRE gets staked and explodes on a human -- drink and put on some silver jewelry
Anyone does V -- toast and drink
ARLENE whines to Sam about work -- drink
Any random gratuitous sex scene -- drink and praise HBO
Any random gratuitous blood scene -- take a big chug of the Tru Blood and praise HBO
MARYANN's pig shows up -- drink and have some bacon as a snack
MARYANN does that shiver thing -- drink
ANYONE says "FANGBANGER" -- toast and drink
ANY sort of NEW FUCKED UP THING appears -- Keep on drinking and praise Charlaine Harris
ANY character suffers some sort of humiliation that's funny -- Keep on drinking and praise Alan Ball

Posted by SusanD :: 8:23 PM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------oOo---------------

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Summer Reading

Do you like to while away lazy summer days reading a good, page-turning book? If you're like me, you could let the day slip into sunset if you're engrossed, and so here's a book that can get you hooked. Now in Kindle format, it's a great time to check out Donald Capone's Into the Sunset.


This book is perfect for a lazy beach day. It's funny, got a snappy plot, and a main character you root for -- not to mention some randy love scenes. And now, on sale for just $2.39, it's a perfect bargain, too!

Posted by SusanD :: 4:50 PM :: 2 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------oOo---------------